Last week’s post touched upon the subject of getting along with your ex-spouse, particularly when it comes to co-parenting the children. Like many divorced parents in Kentucky, you might not necessarily be on friendly terms with your ex. At Blankenship Massey & Associates, Attorneys at Law, we understand that being civil to each other can make all the difference where the children are concerned.
The following points from Parents provide further explanation on how to be friendly with the other parent of your children, as well as why it can help.
1. Suggest to your ex that you both come up with rules and schedules together. Children need and crave routine and structure in their lives. It helps them feel secure and cared for, especially after such an upsetting change as a divorce. It might help to suggest discussing with your ex the schedule and rules that you feel are best for your children, and allow him or her to do the same. You may not come to a complete agreement, and that is fine. However, it may help to unite both of you in terms of raising the children and keeping their structure relatively consistent.
2. Try not to be too concerned about what goes on in the other parent’s home. This may seem counter-productive to the previous point, but after you have had that conversation with your ex, it is often best to let it be – especially if he or she is not as cooperative as you had hoped. As long as you have no reason to believe something terrible is going on when your ex has the children, it may be best to trust that the other parent knows how to parent, even if the rules and routines over there are different from yours.
3. Approach new relationships with caution. It may take a while for your children to get used to the idea of you and their other parent being with someone else. It may be possible – although not common – for exes and their new partners to eventually become friends. It is more common for those involved to be on civil terms during family events and visitation transitions, as long as everyone can remember to treat each other with respect.
Learn about other issues during a divorce by visiting our divorce page.