Behavioral patterns that can damage a marriage

| Apr 23, 2019 | divorce, Firm News

Some couples in Kentucky might assume that the main dangers to marriage are major issues like infidelity or abuse. However, there are many “silent” issues that can chip away at a marriage and eventually be just as harmful.

Over time, some couples simply grow apart. This can happen at any age, but it may be the case for some retired couples in particular. Lying about money can also drive a wedge between a couple. Even if couples do not actively conceal information from one another, simply having different attitudes about money can lead to problems in a marriage. If one or both people in a marriage have unresolved baggage, they may bring those expectations to the relationship and expect the same thing to happen again. This can destroy the relationship if it’s not dealt with.

Some couples fall into patterns of stonewalling. This happens when one person becomes emotionally overwhelmed and refuses to continue a conversation. Another problem is invalidating a spouse’s emotions without even realizing it. One should be aware of when they are contradicting a spouse’s feelings about something, even when it seems minor. Conflict avoidance can also lead to the end of a marriage because the couple will never have the opportunity to resolve issues. In fact, all of the aforementioned behaviors can cause resentment to grow in a relationship.

These same tendencies can even follow couples into divorce negotiations. Sometimes, it may be helpful to conduct negotiations through attorneys. This is generally less expensive and less stressful than proceeding to litigation.